Pregnancy and Hollywood

01.08.2011

I monitor women in film closely and, in fact, it was a research topic while in grad school only it was women in silent film and how the role of the woman on screen represented real life, if at all.

Hollywood has a history of not being kind to women and when an actress reaches my age, it can be counted on that her star is on its way out. This is unfortunate because by the time one reaches my age, hopefully, one has grown into one's own skin. I remember reading that sentiment in my 20s and not understanding what it meant, cause I thought I was “comfortable” back then, but I wasn’t. Nothing like I am now.

For an actress, I imagine that once you reach a point being comfortable in your own skin, it's at that point when you can really take chances and explore roles. But if Hollywood is finding ways to escort you to the door, how are you able to grow as an artist?

Recently, I read an article in the LA Times (and I’m sorry I didn’t keep it and I can’t find a link) and how women in film are changing Hollywood. My generation broke through more barriers than the previous one and now women in my age group are driving the sales in movies. And what we’re interested in ain’t kiddie, perfect romance movies. Yes, there’s always room for a romantic comedy or tear-jerker drama but what studios are finding is that women want to see women on screen that are more like themselves. As a result, we’re seeing more women in their 40s and 50s getting work and not just getting work, but kicking ass while they’re at it.

This phenomenon is affecting other areas of Hollywood too with women producers, writers and directors. This is fantastic!

What I’m wondering, though, is how the image of a pregnant actress is going to change. I know from my actress girlfriends that a baby is death to a career; no one wants to see it. But I’m wondering if that mentality is changing especially with phenomenal actresses like Natalie Portman being pregnant.

It’s not easy for women, by any means. But I’m happy to see changes however subtle they may be.

Toddlers as Live Barbies

06.02.2010

TLC has become my drug. It’s disgusting, foul, wrong on so many levels, and yet, I can’t stop watching it lately. Is there a Reality Show Anonymous group meeting somewhere? I need to join.

The latest disgusting show that I’ve sat through is called Toddlers & Tiaras. Just when I thought that Jon and Kate Plus Eight was rock bottom for the TV station…nope, I was proven wrong. In fact, it’s not just the show. It’s the fact that people do this to their little girls. Look at this picture:

How is this normal? If you’re going to put your kid in a pageant, why does she have to be a Barbie doll? Can’t there be a pageant about how fast a child can run? Or how about whether or not the kid knows her ABCs? I don’t understand the fascination with pageants. I sat through ONE (too many) Miss America pageants in my life – back in the 1980s, I think. It was painful not just because the contestants wouldn’t stop fake smiling or that they couldn’t put a sentence together, but I sat watching them feeling like shit because I didn’t have the kind of body they were strutting on stage.

Just look at these photos:

This isn't cute! Cute is a little girl in pigtails with jeans, Sketchers, and a cute T-shirt with, like, Hello Kitty on it. Cute is a little girl in a polka dotted dress. Cute is not a little girl with the face of a 25 year-old.

And if you watch the show, many of these girls are being taught that they are so special that they are to be waited on hand and foot and that every whim and desire is to be catered to because they are beautiful. Little girls as young as 2 are demanding and throwing temper tantrums because they don’t like something. And not your typical tantrum that 2 year-olds throw. It’s teenaged-level tantrums at the age of 2! It’s gross. One girl insisted on having a stage name that, OK, I get it. Many performers have stage names, but the way this girl was talking about her stage name vs. who she is in “real life,” kept me thinking about the fact that I think she actually had a multiple personality disorder. And if not that, then there was just something off about her. I don’t care what anybody says, sometimes you can just tell.

I know that I’m going to be up crap creek if I ever have a little girl who is a girly-girl. I will have great difficulty relating to her because I’ve always been a tomboy, getting my hands dirty and climbing trees. (Although I always made sure to have the right accessories with me.) Despite being overweight, I was into sports and am way too competitive – much to Rob’s dismay at times. I hate(d) shopping and it wasn’t until college that I discovered make-up. But even to this day I would rather sleep in than get up 30 minutes early to make-up my face.

But I AM open enough that if I did have a girly-girl, that I would do what I could to accept that and support that, but hell if I put her in a pageant. That might make me wrong but I really do think that pageants teach girls all the wrong things. Many of the moms and grandmoms on the show claim that pageants give their (grand)daughters confidence and that’s the reason they put them in. Well, I hate to break it to you…but there are plenty of other ways for girls to gain confidence and NOT be paraded around like pieces of meat from the time they're infants.[1]

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[1] Pictures from Google Images, running a search for Toddlers & Tiaras.

Can Movies Truly Mimic Real Life?

06.01.2010

One of my all-time favorite movies ever is Adrienne Shelly’s Waitress. If you haven’t seen it, I can’t recommend it highly enough. The writing is fantastic and so is the acting. It stars Kerri Russell (from Felicity), Cindy Hines, Shelly herself, Jeremy Sisto (most notably from Six Feet Under) and Andy Griffith is featured in the movie as well.

Rob took me to see this movie when it came out in the theatres (2007) and later told me the story behind the movie that made me fall in love with it all the more. The movie is about a woman who is in a dead marriage who finds out she’s pregnant. Despite not wanting the child, she keeps it and the movie is about her journey during the pregnancy. Every scene about the baby I can identify with; the fears, concerns, wishes, etc.

The story behind the movie is that Adrienne Shelly, who wrote, directed and acted in the movie, never got to see its release because she was murdered in her apartment office in New York. The murder was initially staged to look like a suicide but soon the cops pieced together what happened. An (illegal) immigrant, working on some construction in the building, broke into her office and tried to steal some money from her when she caught him. He panicked, killed her, staged a suicide and fled; he was eventually caught.

The most heartfelt and bittersweet part of the movie is that it was written as a love letter to Shelly’s own daughter who was only 3 years old (I think) when Shelly was killed and who is actually featured right at the end of the movie as Russell’s daughter.

I desperately latch on to (good) movies that are written and directed by women because there are so few women in Hollywood who are able to carve out a niche for themselves in that male-dominated world. And not just carve out a niche but successfully have a husband and child/ren too.

What’s difficult for me though, is at what point does a movie like Waitress separate itself from real-life? The issues and concerns that Shelly brings up in the movie are so identifiable for me.

I find that it would be ironic that I would choose to feel the joy that Russell’s character feels at the end of the movie because of a movie. And I say this mainly because it is I who continuously lambastes Hollywood for selling unobtainable images and dreams to hundreds of thousands of women. I’m not saying that any decision of mine has tipped in any one direction, but it would be an interesting way for a woman whom I never met to communicate to me about something I’m so scared and unsure.

Which again begs the question, Where does a movie stop and real life begin?

P.S. Shelly is one of Russell's co-workers; she is the one with the glasses, in case you don't know who she is.