TV Watching Bad for Babies - Duh!

02.17.2011

When I was a kid, we didn’t own a TV until I was 8 and then the only reason we got one was because my sister’s dad and daughter moved-in with us from Lithuania and my mom felt that it would help them learn English. I hated not having a TV but I only missed it when I was reminded of the fact that we didn’t have one that was, honestly, not often. I would listen to records, play outside alone or with friends, and, I believe, nurtured the neurons that help me be creative.

When I was about 10, my mom instilled a rule that I couldn’t watch TV during the week at all and on the weekends, I was allowed 2 shows on Saturday and 2 shows on Sunday. Oh boy, did I hate that rule and I exploited every opportunity I could find to watch more. And trust me, there were many. Every time I hear the theme to Taxi or Cheers, I’m immediately brought to the late nights at my house where my mom and other adults were partying and she thought I was asleep but I was holed up in a student’s room, on guard at any moment to bolt out of there should my mom come down the hallway. Haha…yes, fun memories.

Now, older and hopefully wiser, I’m so grateful for those rules and plan to instill the same kind of rules should we have kids. I’ve always flinched at the thought of letting babies watch TV and I’m very glad that this article presents data that supports the notion that it’s not a good idea. Interestingly, educational material was shown to have neither a positive or negative effect on babies’ brain development. It was other kinds of shows that caused a developmental delay. Whatever the case may be, I’d rather be safe than sorry. Kids learn their ABCs and numbers when they’re supposed to. A 6-month old shouldn’t be watching Sesame Street because a parent’s convinced that he or she will start speaking by watching it. What’s wrong with letting your child develop naturally? This leads me into a discussion of those parents who scout out schools the minute they learn they’re going to have a baby and start teaching languages, musical instruments, and other things the moment the kid is born. I mean…this stuff makes my head spin.

They're Moody, Dramatic and Amazing

11.30.2010

I’m going to come off smug today. OK, especially smug. I know that there currently are parents with little ones who find it difficult to believe, let alone accept, that their sweet, little, perfect angel will, in about 10 years, become a ball of unrecognizable hormones who will be capable of inflicting (emotional) pain (to his/her parents). I’ve seen more than one set of parents be in complete denial of the reality of who their child is and it’s not pretty. There are aspects of working with teens that I love but they are teens. And just because they’re your teen, doesn’t make them completely innocent and angelic. I value those parents who see and accept their kid for whom they are, the good and the bad. Because, dear parents, teachers see it all.

I read an article in Sunday’s, LA Time’s Parade Magazine about teens.[1] And now to be more smug, most of the info wasn’t news to me, having taken an adolescent psych class before but, nonetheless, it was an informative read. One of my favorite scientific discoveries from the past 10-15 years is that our brains continue to develop into our mid-20s. No wonder it wasn’t until my late 20s that I decided to get serious about my life. Up until then, my brain wasn’t capable of doing so (for the most part).

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the article but, one more thing, before I continue: Those of you with kids, keep in mind that none of us are immune to the following sentiments or incidents:

“I would rather give birth to a baby elephant than raise a teenager again. It would be less painful…I cannot believe that my darling, sweet little girl has turned into a 16-year-old stranger who just wants money from me all the time.” – Renee Cassis, NY.

It’s not “only the rebellious kids who suddenly turn on us…When my friend’s son – a straight-A student and all-around sweetheart – recently ended up in the hospital getting his stomach pumped because he went out drinking with friends for the first time and had no clue how much was too much, that’s when I realized: There is just no predicting.” – Judith Newman (article’s author).

“When a child turns 12, he should be kept in a barrel and fed through the bung hole, until he reaches 16…at which time you plug the bung hole.” – Mark Twain.

I believe that, as parents and anyone looking to be a parent, you do yourself a disservice to not educate yourself on the biological changes that occur in teens. And I don’t mean the obvious (periods and erections) but I mean the changes in brain chemistry. Knowledge is power. Teens need to learn their lessons and appropriate punishment should be given but if you know what’s going on physically, then it helps to understand from where your kid is coming. Teens don’t have that part of their brain that registers “consequences” developed yet (it doesn’t fully form until your mid-20s!), so if you keep that in mind, you can take some extra time and figure out a way to explain the consequences that happened after a bad decision was made. Teens need to understand and they can understand, it just takes more time and patience.

Then, once that’s done, consider investing in some good winery’s stock for a few years and pour yourself and your spouse a glass and count the days until college or he/she moves out.

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[1] http://www.parade.com/news/2010/11/28-inside-the-teenage-brain.html

A Toddler Communicates

06.09.2010

While at my job today, my boss’ 1 1/2 – year old granddaughter came for a visit and while she, the granddaughter, was going on her routine walk around the house, she and her mom and her mom’s friend stopped by the office where I work to say hi. While the little girl’s mom momentarily talked with her friend, the little girl came up to me and pointed to a doll that was nearby. She knew that the doll was mechanical and, using non-verbal communication, told me she wanted me to wind it up. When the doll finished “playing” its guitar, the little girl took my hand and placed it on the wind-up knob because she wanted to watch it move again. Without any words, she told me what she wanted me to do and, luckily, I have the savviness to speak 1.5-year old.

I find the first 5 years of a child’s growth to be fascinating. Even though I grumble about not wanting a newborn and a toddler – and have even said that I wish I could just start with our own 5-year old so I wouldn’t have to do everything for the child – this is precisely the age I don’t want to take part of that I find the most interesting. (Explain that dichotomy to me.)

Anyway, I got the doll to play again and then the little girl decided that she wanted to hold it. So she flashed me cute smile, took the doll and started jamming out of the room like a prisoner breaking out of jail. It was quite funny. Her mom had to go running after her and then explain that the doll had to stay with me but that they could continue on their journey around the house looking for grandma. This seemed to satisfy her.

It has always amazed me how you can totally communicate with a little child who can’t even put two or three words together yet. But each side understands each other (for the most part) and a “dialogue” can take place. The human mind is truly a wonder.