We All Have Multiple Personalities

05.11.2010

I had a dentist’s appointment today – thank goddess for Novocain – and as we were talking about some mutual people that we know, it hit me how we all have different faces that we show different people. It’s as if we by nature have multiple personalities subconsciously cherry-picking what side of ourselves we will show to whom.

This particular individual that the dentist and I were talking about isn’t someone I necessarily know well but I do know a family member very well. To my dentist, this said individual is a really nice person, courteous and business-oriented.

The background that I happen to know is that this particular person not only mistreats family members but is a bigot and a racist who happens to be raising children with these beliefs. Where do we draw the line – at least in our heads – that someone may be nice overall but is doing something so unforgivable?

I think it’s incorrigible to be raising children with such beliefs especially when espousing Christian dogma. I know that this happens in the world and for many years I prided myself in not knowing anyone like that but in recent years, I’ve been taught that isn’t the case. Actually, on second thought, that’s not true. Growing up in the Lithuanian community, I came across many racists. The Lithuanian community is not…the most progressive, to put it mildly.

How do you tell a child that such teachings are wrong when he/she will experience it or see it out on the playground? How do you tell a child that he/she needs to take the “higher ground” when so many children and their parents don’t? And how do you hope that your child sees the good when there’s so much bad?