Yet Again...

10.25.2010

Found out that yet another person I know is pregnant. Since I'm feeling that the entire world around me is having babies, I decided to sit down and count amongst my friends how many have had a baby in the past year or became pregnant. Over 50% of my friends are pregnant. Is this normal? I mean, is it normal for someone to personally know so many at one time who are pregnant?

Part of me yells out, “What the hell are you waiting for?” And then another part yells, “Shut the hell up!”

I worked for about 4 hours today on a creative project where I lost myself in my work, content to be in the moment. If I had a kid, I wouldn’t have that. Or if I did, it would have to be planned, thought out and scheduled ahead of time and that’s if I found a babysitter. How is that living in the moment?

This whole situation is confusing. The clock’s tics are actually getting louder. It hit me a few days ago that I’m a few months away from being one more year closer to 40 and I physically felt the pressure that this baby decision needs to be made soon. Of the people that I know who are pregnant, 2 couples have been trying for years to conceive. Another couple hit it on the first try. You just don’t know and I wish that there were some inkling into knowing how long it will take. Just having that piece of information would help.