A Little Bit O' Drama Never Hurt

08.04.2010

Breaking news: I really think something is wrong with me. Like, I’m sure I look normal to someone who randomly glances at me. But there’s something off.

I finally made it to the gyno this morning and I shared the waiting room space with a bunch of expectant mothers, children, and one brand new baby. I mean, brand spankin’ new. I felt like an alien because I wanted to run screaming. I can’t help but look at a pregnant woman and think of how odd her body looks. Honestly, I never thought of pregnancy as beautiful or not until Rob mentioned years ago that it freaks him out. So I have inevitably adopted this mentality.

Once in the room and waiting for the doctor, I realized that this vacillation is typical of me. While an undergraduate at SMC, I had 5 different majors; a new one each semester. Making a commitment to something that has to do with the rest of my life is stressful and difficult for me. Rob seems to be the only commitment I never hesitated on. Why can’t the rest of the decisions be this easy?

I knew in 7th grade that I’d major in History and yet, once I hit college, I thought about archeology, anthropology, English literature, and pre-med only to ultimately come back to what I knew since 1987. (I wanted to major in film more than anything else but, well…that’s a long story.)

There are very few things in my life that I treat with pompous production and this is because I grew up with an artist mother and an artist/singer sister. Pompous productions don’t always have to be bad but I err on the side of simplicity. Usually. I suppose I can strive to be as different as I can from my mother…but the apple really doesn’t fall that far from the tree. I apparently like a little bit of drama.

Stay tuned…